I have given a lot of thought in the last few weeks to the
meaning of the Shukke Tokudo Ceremony. The name
literally means "To leave home and to attain the Way."
But what exactly does it mean to leave home and to attain the
Way? I particularly wondered about this because there is no
expectation that I will actually be leaving my wife and baby
daughter, and in fact I will be driving back home with them and
my parents after this is over. During the ceremony itself I stood
before my family and said "We can not cut off the bonds of
love and affection insofar as we transmigrate in the triple
world. To enter the Changeless World by disregarding the favors
that we have been given by relatives is the true way of repaying
them." However, as Bishop Matsuda said to me before the
ceremony, one does not actually intend to cut off love and
affection.
So what then does it mean to say these things? What does it mean
to say that one is renouncing family and home life? Does it
really mean to renounce love, obligation and responsibility? What
kind of people would we be if we even tried to do such a thing?
When I think about my wife, Yumi, my baby daughter, Julie, and my
parents and brother I can not even imagine cutting off the
feelings I have for them or trying to shirk my responsibilities
in regard to them. Not that I have been or am a perfect husband,
father, son or brother but there is within me the deep wish live
up to those roles and to try to bring happiness to those I care
about. To deny these feeling would, it seems to me, be a denial
of my humanity. Nichiren himself felt this way and in "The
Conversation Between a Sage and an Unenlightened Man"
Nichiren wrote:
"Ever since I began to study the Dharma handed down
from Shakyamuni Buddha and undertook the practice of the
Buddhist teachings, I have believed it is most important to
understand one's obligations to others, and made it my first
duty to repay such debts of kindness. In this world, we owe
four debts of gratitude. One who understands this is worthy
to be called human, while one who does not is no more than a
beast." (MW-5, p.94)
When I reflect, however, on the way that I and so many others
actually live, I realize that even though we say that we value
love and responsibility, in actuality we pursue the things of
this world like family, companionship, careers and hobbies for
the sake of our own personal satisfaction. Whether to stave off
loneliness, bolster our self-worth or to satisfy some other need
we cling to others for our own sake and not for their own. Even
if we are able to spare a moment to think of others before
ourselves, it is usually only when it is convenient for ourselves
and almost always to help others pursue goals which are just as
self-oriented and short-sighted as our own usually are. The
Buddha Dharma teaches us, however, that there is no such thing as
lasting self-satisfaction, so our efforts to find such a thing
either on or own or with the help of others is doomed to futility
and frustration. Despite this teaching however, we rarely ever
stop and think about some other approach to life and living for
either ourselves or those we say we care for.
In Buddhism, the recognition that there is no such thing as
lasting self satisfaction is based upon the three characteristics
of all phenomena - impermanence, unsatisfactoriness and
selflesness. Which is to say that all phenomena are only
temporary, therefore they can not fully satisfy our needs nor can
they form a basis for any kind of substantial selfhood. All
things, including ourselves, are subject to change. When I look
at my own daughter, for instance, I realize that as much as I
cherish the way she is now and no matter how much I treasure the
moment when she says her first word or the moment when she will
take her first steps this will all pass away much too quickly,
and before I know it Yumi and I will be worrying about who she's
dating or why she's staying out so late or whether her grades are
good enough to get into a good school. Even in the case of my
daughter, I have to admit that her life is characterized by
impermanence, accompanied by all kinds of worry and distress and
lacking in any kind of fixed selfhood. This is true of all those
I love. This is true of myself. Realizing this is to confront
what Buddhism calls the Great Matter of Birth and Death. Once
again let me share with you Nichiren's words on this:
"The sufferings that meet our eyes in this present
world are lamentable enough. How much more lamentable are
those that one will encounter on the long road of death! How
can we fail to be pained at the thought of it? A thing to be
boundlessly feared is the life hereafter; a matter of
greatest concern is the existence to come!" (MW-5, p.95)
In light of the Great Matter we must rethink our priorities
and look for the deeper significance of life beyond that of
simply meeting our mundane obligations and pursuing our secular
ambitions. We should not waste our lives in the futile search for
temporary happiness when there is even the slightest possibility
of freeing ourselves from the dilemma of birth and death and
tasting the true joy of liberation. Ultimately, we must ask
ourselves what we wish to do with our lives. If we devote
ourselves to the things of this world, eventually we must leave
them all behind at the moment of our own inevitable deaths no
matter how much we cherish them. In that moment, what could
possibly console that loss? As everyone knows, we can't take
anything with us and no one can accompany us on that final
journey. In regard to this, Nichiren decided it would be much
more fruitful to dedicate his life to the Dharma, even if it
meant giving up his life. In the letter entitled "The
Persecution at Tatsunokuchi" he wrote:
"How many are the places where I died in past
existences for the sake of my family, lands and kin! I have
given up my life on mountains, seas and rivers, on the
seashore and by the roadside, but never once did I die for
the Lotus Sutra or suffer persecution for the daimoku. Hence
none of the ends I met enabled me to reach enlightenment.
Because I did not attain Buddhahood, the seas and rivers
where I died are not the Buddha land." (MW-1, p.13)
What Nichiren discovered was that by devoting his life to the
Dharma he was able to resolve the Great Matter of Birth and
Death. He was able to recover the true and deep meaning of living
from the jaws of meaninglessness and death. In turning from the
world to the Dharma he gained the capacity to return to the world
not as a place to be enured, but as the Pure Land itself. In the
same letter, he writes the following in regard to his brush with
death at the execution ground of Tatsunokuchi:
"Of all the places in this world, it is at
Tatsunokuchi in Katase of Sagami Province where Nichiren's
life dwells. Because he gave his life there for the sake of
the Lotus Sutra, Tatsunokuchi may well be called the Buddha
land. This principle is found in the Jinriki chapter, where
it states, `Whether in a grove, in a garden, on a mountain,
in a valley or in a broad field,...the Buddhas enter
nirvana.'" (MW-1, p.14)
Like Nichiren, we should strive for the true wisdom and
compassion of the Buddha so that we can clearly see the
impermanent, unsatisfactory and selfless nature of things and
stop futilely pursuing lasting self satisfaction. In turning from
a life lived merely for our own sakes, we free ourselves to see
and live life just as it is, as the unfolding of the Wonderful
Dharma itself. In this unfolding we find the selfless self which
is eternally pure and blissful. In this awakening we find that
our relationships are tranformed as well. Families and
communities that were once bound by so-called enlightened
self-interest become families and communities of true
enlightenment guided by unconditional love and mutual compassion.
What is Shukke Tokudo - leaving home and attaining the
Way? It is not, after all, turning our backs on our loved ones or
reneging on our obligations and responsibilities. Rather, it is a
reorientation of our lives whereby we cease livng life for our
own sake and strive to live for the sake of all. This change of
priorities is not the common way of the world, so it may
sometimes upset the expectations of others whose priorities are
not centered on the Dharma and whose priorities are limited by
mundane concerns. In the end, however, the goal is to awaken
ourselves, our families, our communities and our world to the
unshakeable source of true happiness which is the True Dharma.
Again, to quote from Nichiren one last time:
"There is a passage in the sutras that says, `By
renouncing one's obligations and entering nirvana one can
truly repay those obligations in full.' Thus we see that he
who casts aside all bonds of indebtedness and love in this
present life and enters into the true path of Buddhism is the
one who really understands the meaning of obligations"
(MW-5, p.97-98)
In "leaving home and attaining the Way" I am making
a commitment to live not merely for my own sake, or merely for my
family's sake, or merely for the sake of pursuing cultural
expectations and concerns but for the sake of unfolding the
Wonderful Dharma for all. I do not at all believe that this
Tokudo Ceremony has been able to instantly transform me into some
kind of saint. I still have the same shortcomings, bad habits and
attachments that I did before. What is different is that I have
expressed my willingness to overcome these things and to seek for
enlightenment itself for myself and for others. I hope that in
this way, moment-by-moment we can all do our part in transforming
this world with all it's seeming shortcomings and tragedies into
a Pure Land. In the words of a song that I learned from a former
teacher of mine:
Let it begin with every step we take,
Let it begin with every change we make,
Let it begin with every chain we break,
Let it begin every time we awake.
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